Polydent might help with that.
Bum to 2 girls walking down the street: “Damn girl you got a fine ass!!! If I had teeth I would bite it!” –location unknown
View ArticleHobos vs Hippies: The Epic Battle
Context: Connecticut Avenue around mid-day. Various Greenpeace fanatics around. One is professing her love of the environment on some yuppie. Another spots her next target: a tall man, long coat, just...
View ArticleHobo economics
Broke guy: I’ll give you a dollar if you give me two dollars!(inside the Gallery Place Metro)
View ArticlePersistence is futile
Homeless man on sidewalk in Adams Morgan: You got some change?Girl: No, sorry, no change.Homeless man: Well I’ll take dollars.Girl: No, no cash at all.Homeless man: Well, I’ll walk with you to the ATM.
View ArticleBeggars CAN be choosers
Girl walking out of a restaurant with a pizza box in her hand decides to offer it to a homeless guy outside the restaurant: Girl: Hey, you want the rest of this pizza?Bum: Hmmm, what toppings you...
View ArticleEavesdropDC loves crock pots.
[Female GW student walking through GW campus with her friends and past a crazy homeless man.] Crazy Homeless man: “Hey there little bunny, I can assist you with your rabbit tonight!” (Girl ignores...
View ArticleTil death do us part
Leaving the office, two coworkers chatting idly, in the background, a homeless man shouts incoherently while rattling the Express newspaper box: Coworker #1: Awww… I missed this guy. He hasn’t been...
View ArticleIt depends, how frequently are her prayers answered?
Homeless man: Spare some change?Tourist woman: I won’t give you money, but I’ll pray with you.Homeless man: Ah shit, bitch. Do you really think your prayers will buy me a 40? -Lafayette Park
View ArticleI can has a home?
Waiting outside kstreet lounge: Homeless man: Wanna donate to UNCF?20-something: What’s UNCF?Homeless man: United Negro Cheeseburger Fund!
View ArticleGet that guy a record deal
Rosslyn, near the corner of Wilson Blvd outside of a Starbucks: propecia rash Homeless man singing at the top of his lungs to the tune of Kings of Leon “Use Somebody” … Man: “You knowww that I could...
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